BEING BRAVE ENOUGH TO SAY YES

In our adoption yard sale purge, I stumbled upon an old devotional/workbook that had never been used.  It was Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby and Claude King.  Now, I'm not one to pass up a workbook style devotional so naturally, it didn't make it out to the sale.  Instead, it made its way to our bookshelf and it's been in my lap most mornings since.

One of the things I adore about God's Word is its relevance.  No matter how old a devotional is, as long as it's rooted in God's Word, it's relevant.  My copy is a reprint from 1994 yet I'm gleaning truth from it as though it was published yesterday.

The workbook is big and I'm not even halfway through yet but one thing that Blackaby has stressed up until this point is that our relationship with God hinges on our experience of Him.  In other words, we can only know of God what we experience of Him.

One of the perks of being born after Jesus walked the earth and after the Bible was compiled is that I get to read about who God is in His Word.  I can know a lot about God based on what I study about Him.  But I would agree with Blackaby that it is not until I experience the things I've read about God that my head knowledge becomes heart knowledge.

It's as we experience God that we discover who He is.

The word 'experience' can be defined as both a noun and a verb.

The definition of experience as a noun is "practical contact with and observation of facts or events".  It's a physical, touch-it, feel-it, live-in-it, encounter.  A you-had-to-be-there type of thing.

The definition of experience as a verb is "encounter or undergo (an event or occurrence)".  It's an ongoing, moving, you're-different-afterward, type of thing.

To experience God is different than reading about Him, it's faith in action.  Faith is "confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see" (Hebrews 11:1).  Faith is confidence in God (who He says He is and what He promises) even when He or His promises are not tangible.

And the funny thing about experiencing God is that He (as far as I've read in the Bible and something that Blackaby points out) always precedes the experience of Him by requesting faith of us.  In other words, God presents opportunities to us that He asks us to join Him in by faith before allowing us to experience the outcome.  This request of faith before sight teaches us over time that God is faithful.  And as our awareness of His faithfulness grows deeper, so does our faith.  It's a cycle of growth that becomes stronger with every faith-filled 'yes' we agree to.

When God initially presented adoption to me, I was nervous and full of self-doubt (still am, to be honest).  But God wasn't asking me to be capable, to be prepared, or to be talented.  He was asking me to have faith.  He was only asking me to be brave enough to say yes to His request.  After that, He would do the rest.

One of the things I love about God is that He did not create me to be a robot.  He will not make me do anything (I don't believe that makes certain things about following Him optional but that is for a different post).  Out of His love for me, He asks.  And out of my love for Him, I learn to trust and to respond. 

I've had other faith requests from God in my life, like when He asked me to trust Him with becoming a Young Life leader, or when He asked me to surrender going to college, or when He asked me to trust Brad with the rest of my life.  And the first step in every ask was to just be brave enough to start with a 'yes'.

Do I know what I'm doing in this adoption?
Absolutely not.

Are Brad and I prepared for what it means to bring a Chinese-speaking child into our lives as a permanent family member?
Not in the slightest.

Am I anxious for the unknowns?
You bet.

Am I worried about Abi and Andrew and what this adoption will mean for them?
100%.

Do I think I'm cut out for this?
Don't make me laugh.

Do we have $37,500 just chillin' in the bank?
See my last answer.

But none of those are the right or relevant questions.  The question is: when God asks something of me, will I be brave enough to say 'yes'?

Each day, I have to be willing to say 'yes'.

When we stare at page after page of special needs with no idea how to help, we have to be brave enough to still say 'yes' to God's call to adopt.

When Andrew asks the legit question, "Mom, when the new 'baby' comes, won't that take away time from you to spend with me?", I have to be brave enough to still say 'yes' to God's call to adopt.

When the bill for $6,000 comes and we don't know how to pay it yet, we have to be brave enough to still say 'yes' to God's call to adopt.

Because it's out of this experience that we will know more of God.  He proves Himself to be faithful and therefore we have more faith.

Is there anything God has asked of you recently that you feel unqualified for, nervous about, or just straight scared of?  If there is, I feel you.  I don't have the answers to the future for you but I can say that we serve a faithful God and what He asks of us He always asks because He loves us and He wants us to experience more of who He is.  You don't have to be ready, you don't have to be talented, you don't have to be rich.  Just be brave enough to say 'yes'.  And God will do the rest.